I’ve been sitting on these photos for a while because I loved how awesome they came out (thanks to the amazing Elena) and I wanted to use them for a post about personal style and what it means to me.
It then became a post about the loss of motivation I’ve had recently, even though I’m much happier than I’ve been for a while.
Basically, this post has gone through a lot of different stages, none of which have ended up more than a few lines.
Instead, on reviewing the photos, I had a few thoughts. These ranged from how much I love them and how cool I think this (almost entirely Topshop) outfit is, to all the personal issues I have with my own body and the flaws I notice about myself.
I notice the cellulite on my legs, the weird dented scar on my thigh I’ve had since I was a baby, the flab on my arms and the way my stomach sticks out. I notice all these things that nobody else would, because they are issues that came to light as an insecure teenager which will take work to dissipate as I grow. I notice all these things because they are things I have been told are imperfections, and things the media makes us believe aren’t attractive.
I notice them, but I’m not letting them affect me. Or at least, I’m trying. I have a rocky relationship with my body, as do most people I know.
The older I get, the more in touch I’m becoming with my personal style and that is something which helps, a lot. For me, dressing in something I’m comfortable in and I like the way I look in helps me accept the many flaws I know exist about myself.
My personal relationship with myself has never been the best, but it’s getting somewhere. I no longer refuse to wear crop tops because I’m scared people will see my midriff. I wear baggy mom jeans because I like the style, not because I’m trying to hide the size of my thighs any more.
I wear corset shorts and sheer tops because I love how they look and make me feel, despite the worries I have.
It’s not easy, but these days I have more good days than bad days, and I’m really happy about that.
I’m slowly working on accepting myself and it feels good. How do you deal with personal issues with your body?